cause im too bored on e toilet bowl

I'm in Scape's toilet just bside e 'Warehouse' n I'm blogging cus I'm hvg diarrhea n there's nth I can do on e toilet bowl. E area below my bellybutton have been hurting since last night.

Either I have too good an imagination or I'm just plain bo liao. Believe it or not, the first thing tt came to my mind was what if I have some intestine or womb cancer(since e pain is tt area) which could well just be a case of eating dirty food. Yea perhaps e teochew porridge I had last night, know those kinda old stalls where their food is so awesome n I close one eye(perhaps both eyes) on e cleanliness n hygiene part.

So oh wells, this is what I get from ignoring. And as I type this sentence, I've been in e cubicle on e toilet bowl for almost 40mins. I'm in e first cubicle n I can tell u that e whole place smells of my poop. I don't exactly feel bad about it since not many ppl come to scape and tt its a situation where I dnt have any control over. oh, perhaps I shld move to a higher level, confirm lesser ppl right, so I'd b more considerate. Hmm... But I'm still in e midst n I'm too lazy to shift, so just let it be la. Its normal for e toilet to smell poop-y(its a toilet, DUH) plus there are 7 other cubicles out there available.

So as I was saying about e cancer thought, I dunno if its me thinking weirdly or mayb it has got to do w losing friends at this age, or maybe I'm just listing out causes in my mind. and on pms-sy days or jus any other days I get worse, I start thinking its so possible to die in every other way. No, I didn't watch too much final destination, e recent one was my first.

I stand at mrt platforms n as I see e mrt approaching, e flash of e headlights incepts a thought in my head. Wat if someone pushes me from e back or wat if I slipped n life ends in tt instant. will e train thn stop or will I be stuck underneath. Will anyone recognize me, will I feel anything?

At traffic light junctions, I have similar thoughts too.

I think I've told A abt me hvg such thoughts b4, and his answer will always be on e lines of, "don't fear death", "if its ur time, it is", "there will b eternal happiness in heaven."

I guess such advices allows me to live life to e fullest, and assures and comforts me tt dying aint that bad. I mean, yea, everyone dies eventually n we jus have to accept that. One day, my beloved dogs will go, one day, my parents will leave, one day I'd be e one. No one lives here forever.

And dnt worry, if anyone is to read this, I'm not in depression nor having suicidal thoughts. Its just random toilet-bowl-blabberings.

I have to get up from e throne soon, e alternation btwn peeing n shitting for e past hour is making my asshole sore.